WTF please no

Please, do not name your kid this. Trust me
  1. Bartholomew
    • Origin:

      Aramaic
    • Meaning:

      "son of the furrow"
    • Description:

      Bartholomew is an apostle's name that's been out of favor for centuries but might appeal again to the parent in search of an old but rare choice. The challenge could be to avoid the Simpson-ish nickname. That character, by the way, has the full name of Bartholomew JoJo Simpson, and creator Matt Groening came up with Bart as an--uh oh--anagram for brat. Two old alternate nicknames are Barty and Tolly.
  2. Beyonce
    • Origin:

      Invented name
    • Description:

      You know who Beyonce is. One of the most famous people in the world. When she was born, her name was truly unique; it was a riff on her mom's maiden name, Biyence, with an accent over the final e.
  3. Britney
    • Origin:

      Variation of Brittany
    • Description:

      This abbreviated spelling, which also relates to Whitney, quickly took on a life of its own, thanks to the megafame of Britney Spears, but it's already beginning to burn out.
  4. CARROT
    • Cecil
      • Origin:

        Latin
      • Meaning:

        "blind"
      • Description:

        Once a powerful Roman clan name, Cecil has lost much of its potency over the years, though it retains a strong presence in the sports and jazz worlds. Past bearers include film giant Cecil B. DeMille, poet Cecil Day Lewis, father of Daniel, and photographer Cecil Beaton. Fictional Cecils appear in Oscar Wilde's play, Lady Windemere's Fan, E. M. Foster's A Room With a View and the film Lee Daniel's The Butler.
    • Christ
      • Origin:

        English from Greek
      • Meaning:

        "anointed, messiah"
      • Description:

        Meaning "anointed one" in Greek, this was a title applied to Jesus by early Greek-speaking followers. It has been used as the English form of both Christos and Chrestos, which means "good".
    • Fifi
      • Origin:

        French, diminutive of Josephine
      • Meaning:

        "Jehovah increases"
      • Description:

        Fifi is a perfect name -- for a French poodle. But Fifi may seem more child-friendly as names like Coco and Lulu rise. Fifi in its fluffiness also balances the seriousness of such full names as Josephine or Federica.
    • Hayden
      • Origin:

        English place name
      • Meaning:

        "hay valley"
      • Description:

        Hayden – a formerly obscure name that's risen to huge popularity – has dipped in this year's ratings. Though Hayden is among the most distinctive of the bunch, it gets lost in the crowd of Jaidens, Bradens, Aidans, and endless variations. Associated with Hayden Christensen, of Star Wars fame.
    • Judas
      • Origin:

        Greek variation of Judah
      • Meaning:

        "praised"
      • Description:

        Though there were two apostles named Judas, everyone remembers the one who betrayed Jesus, and the name has been permanently shunned.
    • Kanye
      • Origin:

        African place-name, Nigeria
      • Meaning:

        "honor, tribute"
      • Description:

        Kanye West propelled his name into the Top 900 in the early 2000s, at the height of his popularity, though now it has dropped off the baby-naming map. In addition to its African derivation, it is a Hawaiian name meaning 'free'.
    • Leviticus
      • Origin:

        Greek
      • Meaning:

        "belonging to the Levites"
      • Description:

        Old Testament book way too heavy to carry.
    • METHUSELAH
      • Miley
        • Origin:

          Modern invented name
        • Description:

          One-time overnight success name, thanks to Hannah Montana actress and singer Miley Cyrus, Miley fell just as quickly from her peak of Number 127 in 2008 as the star entered her rebellious era.
      • Mingus
        • Origin:

          Scottish, variation of Menzies
        • Meaning:

          "tenants of a manor"
        • Description:

          Supermodel Helena Christensen named her son in honor of jazz great Charles Mingus, opening up a whole category of jazzy possibilities: Kenton, Calloway, Ellington, Gillespie, Mulligan, Tatum, and Thelonius.
      • Pat
        • Origin:

          Diminutive of Patricia
        • Meaning:

          "noble, patrician"
        • Description:

          An early and still quintessentially androgynous name, now supplanted by thousands of fresher options.
      • Zaccheus
        • Origin:

          Variation of Zachariah
        • Description:

          A New Testament tax collector was called Zaccheus, the freshest spin on this biblical favorite.
      • Zachariah
        • Origin:

          Hebrew, form of Zechariah
        • Meaning:

          "the Lord has remembered"
        • Description:

          This distinguished name still feels a bit ancient, but with the rise of such former graybeards as Jeremiah and Elijah, it also sounds child-friendly again, as does the Latin-Greek form Zacharias.